Monday, November 21, 2011

She is...

... a joy giver!
She is full of life!
She is resilient!
She is a firecracker!
She is beautiful in every way!
She is 3 years old!
She absolutely LOVES to learn!
She also LOVES her momma's crochet projects:)
She thinks life is a song!
Her mommy has had a very hard 6 months and God has given her healing powers!
She is life for my soul and a light in my heart!
Oh thank you Jesus for each moment with have with Piper Jane! We are soaking her up!!

Saturday, November 19, 2011


I realized a couple of months ago while doing a Bible study with the women at Grace Fellowship Bible that the thing that really grips me, stands in the way of truly following and trusting Him is fear. While we were sharing our obstacles or things we struggle with all of the other women said several things that they personally struggle with and then it came to me and all I had written was FEAR! Everything pretty much revolved around this in my life. What kind of fear? So many different levels. My ultimate fear is that my family will not know the Lord and will not be FOLLOWERS of Him. Oh this fear sometimes cripples me for my children. I somehow think that if I do A, B, and C then they will come to know Him. I know that's not the way it works but oh I wish it were... and then no, I don't want it to be that way b/c I wouldn't do it good enough to lead them there. None of us could ever earn His favor. Other fears are just terrible accidents. People quit telling me about freak accidents b/c then I fear they will happen to one of us. I mean, the more children you have the greater your odds, right?! Sound silly? Well, that's what has gripped me. BUT He has risen and He is a living God and He is NOT finished with me yet. I truly have lifted my arms up to Him and given Him my fears. Fear is not from the Lord! FEAR IS NOT FROM THE LORD! So why am I allowing Satan to have so much control of my life by fearing!! After giving Him my fears and laying them on the alter, I truly feel He has asked me to study His word for EVERYTHING it says about fear AND trusting!!! Obviously if I'm fearing, I'm not trusting. I am SO excited about searching His word. Confession... I have NEVER hungered to be in the word. I've wanted to so badly but never truly hungered for it. Last year I read the Bible all the way through but I still didn't delve through it to learn more and more. I am so thankful for the hunger for His word He has given me.
Here are a couple of passages I've read about fear ... now I don't just read the verses stated I go back and get the entire context b/c I really don't have a great knowledge of the Word. So if fear is something you struggle with, join me!! I told my husband, "WOW... how scary is it for Satan to know that I am giving up FEAR!!"
Genesis 21:16-17 .. Hagar and Ismael: What did she fear and what did the Lord say? I read a couple chapters around these verses to get the story behind them.
Genesis 26: 6-7 .. Isaac and Rebekah: What did Isaac fear? What was the result of this fear? I read a couple chapters around this as well.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Same pump, totally different story!

A week ago I was at the Kroger gas pump talking on the phone while trying to get the pump started. Now let me add, I was actually waiting on the phone b/c a friend of mine had to take another call. The pump was messing up and said it couldn't read my Kroger card and then it was canceling the transaction, yaddy yada. Now I'm a pro at the gas pump. I don't waste time. I have found the most efficient order to make sure I get the gas pumping quickly;0) it's true... I don't like wasting time at the pump. HEhe!
Well for some reason the pump was just acting up. I hear someone say, "ma'am". I didn't think much of it and then I heard it again really loud "MA'AM!!" I looked behind me and a middle aged man in a nice truck said, "are you gonna talk on the phone or are you gonna pump gas?" WOW! Are you serious?!!! I calmly put the pump back in the machine and took a few steps towards his truck and said, "Are you talking to me?" He then rudely restates his bold statement. I very calmly (this is true I was very calm) let him know he didn't know me and had no right to address me in a rude manner. I told him the pump was messing up and since he was being so inconvenienced he may need to find another pump. His wife was in the truck and you could tell by the look on her face very few stood up to him. He took my advice and found another pump... at another station. I was just shocked at how rude people could be. I was thankful the Lord held my tongue and just let him know he was being inappropriate instead of being inappropriate right back.
Fast forward a week.
Today I was pumping gas and I see a man who is obviously homeless and probably mentally ill ask a couple of people if he could make a call on their phone. Both men he asked didn't really even give him eye contact and said "no". Oh it broke my heart. But those of you who know me know I have the most ridiculous amount of compassion, like maybe to a fault. He began to walk off and then turned around and came towards me. He said, "do you have a phone I could use to make a phone call?" I said, "absolutely". I got my iPhone out of the car and gave it to him but he wasn't quite sure how to use it so he asked if I could dial the number for him. As he was waiting for someone to answer he began pacing around my vehicle, I said with a smirky smile "okay now if you're gonna borrow my phone you're gonna have to stand by me". He said, "oh no I'm not gonna steal from you. I promise I'm not gonna take your phone." I looked him in the eye and said, "I know that. I believe you but it wouldn't be wise of me to let you out of my sight" :) He then sat there with me by the pump. My eyes just continually welled up. He finally got a hold of someone. When he went to return my phone he said, "thank you. All these folks with a phone and not nobody gonna let me make ONE call". I said "you're welcome and God bless you! I'm going to pray for you." He then stood up and looked at me with the most sincere face and gasped, "My momma is saved!! My momma is saved! I get it. That's why you let me borrow your phone." He continually thanked me and wished to pay me back. I told him, "there's no need!!! This isn't my phone. It's His! God doesn't give us things to hoard, He gives us things to help those in need". Oh my heart was full as we shook hands. When I got in the car I verbally said, "God you don't want me to live life SAFELY!!! You want me to seek you in EVERY circumstance."
Lord Jesus protect my friend tonight!

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

A Wonderfully, painful place to be...

God has me in the most AMAZING place of insufficiency where I know that I need Him for absolutely EVERYthing. It is the most unsuccessful place to be but the MOST joyful place to be. Unfortunately this joy is not how you would imagine it to look. I am battered and torn and ever so exhausted but I am right where HE wants me!! I know God is speaking truth to me and has a great work in store for me so of course right now I am experiencing spiritual warfare that is REAL. Please lift up my family in your prayers. Don't pray necessarily for satan to ignore us but for us to feel the presence of God SO powerfully that we will courageously stand our ground! That even against attacks we are able to glorify God in where He is calling us. Thank you to my friends who have been a constant encouragement to me! You know who you are and God has brought you along for the battle and I thank you for doing your part!